It's been a while but they have returned to rock in the new millennium. Yes, the stadium filling, unit shifting colossus that is Bon Jovi is back to conquer the world once again. In the 80's and early 90's they gave love a bad name, lived on a prayer, guzzled down their fair share of bad medicine and were careful on stage, after all it gets slippery when wet! But solo projects and Jon's acting career enforced a lengthy sabbatical and during this time their contemporaries have fallen by the way side.
So have they moved on? Are they relevant anymore? And does anyone care? More like aluminium foil than heavy metal and with more in common with the pumice stone at the side of the bath than Metallica's two-ton slab of granite, the question is, have they still got what it takes to keep on rockin' in the free world?
Well, from the minute the soaring, big chested, fist in the air anthem 'It's My Life' kicks into gear it soon becomes apparent that they must have locked all their ideas, instruments and songs in a time capsule. There is a bit of vocoder action, some gigantic riffs and mighty vocals. In fact this is the perfect soundtrack to a convertible sports car advert. 'Say It Isn't So' is straight out of the Def Leppard school of big-haired soft rock and 'Two Storey Town' blatantly rips off Joan Osborne's 'What If God Was One Of Us'. Elsewhere, aside from the Bon Jovi-by-numbers of 'Mystery Train', the shockingly titled 'Captain Crash & The Beauty Queen From Mars' (must have been listening to Ziggy Stardust that day!), starts off bizarrely like James' 'Sit Down' and ends up Oasis' 'Stay Young'.
The ballads range from tender and sickly – 'Thank You For Loving Me' - to epic and ridiculous – 'Save The World' – and the lyrical content provides some thoroughly side-splitting moments. Closing track 'I Could Make A Living Out Of Lovin' You', is a full on stomper with Jon stating "24-7 I'm your handyman" and "I don't mind getting dirty, that's my middle name". The perfect finale, it's as though he is pitching to write the script for a new Carry On movie.
So the big hair may have gone, and their appearance may have changed but ultimately the song remains the same. Inside the sleeve Jon defiantly wears an old school "Bon Jovi Forever" t-shirt, and you can bet that all over the world fans are dusting off their faded denim jackets. Inoffensive as ever these good time guys have obviously matured just a tiny, tiny amount, all found love and rushed this out just in time to fend off their impending, collective mid-life crisis. Until the next time, let us rock!
