For those who suspect that the New Acoustic Movement is just an elaborate practical joke played on the music press by Badly Drawn Boy and a few Manc drinking pals, the opening track on 'I Am Kloot's debut album won't allay many fears.
Guitars are strummed so softly it seems like the band are in danger of falling asleep on record. Harmonies struggle to go from weak to winsome. And as the vocals plead for a girlfriend to take pity on these poor limp wristed saps, beards across the nation take root in sympathy.
Thank God, then, for snide journalism like the above, because a few barbed comments have clearly got singer John Bramwell riled. And when he gets a bee in his bonnet, a chip on his shoulder and quite possibly an ant in his lower regions, he develops a venomous poeticism that gives I Am Kloot a crucial edge.
'Morning Rain' comes on like John Lennon spitting razor blades in a down-at-heel local, the line "I've never seen so many people smoke so many cigarettes" delivered with a perfect sneer, and for once such cynicism is inspiring rather than defeated and deadening.
Because if I Am Kloot have any point at all, it's to charter the dim and dismal, to undertake doomed relationships in damp basements, and find the few shards of bitter magic that keep us from leaping from the nearest bridge. 'No Fear Of Falling' is a hair's breadth away from vulnerability and probable alcoholism but keeps upright all the same.
'Storm Warning' has arrogance choking on itself as John's ambitions give way to insecurity, and the "there's blood on your leg/I love you" chorus of 'Twist' speaks volumes about the extremes of desperation that love can drag you to.
In fact, ten tracks in and you're actually grateful that the music provides a soft respite from the grubby realism of the lyrics. Were the songs to reflect the content they'd be closer to Slayer than Squeeze. And that really would be too much like the smell of Napalm in the morning for anybody.
